Skip to main content

How far we've come

Last night, I was sitting on the couch, and my precious L, my princess, walked across the room to where I was sitting and crawled up into my lap. It led me to start reflecting on just how far we've come in the last 5 years. While we have made a purposeful decision to seek out a child with special needs for this adoption, our initial plunge into special needs parenting was quite accidental. We have all come a long way since then.

Our princess L is 5 1/2 now. Initially there were no signs that she might have special needs - no risk factors, no alarming tests, just the realization at about 6 months old that she wasn't developing properly. Up until that point in my life, I was very focused on worldly success and achievements - on DOING. I thought you made your impact on this world by what you did.

Princess L didn't do much for a long time. She was over a year old when she sat up for the first time, close to 3 when she began walking. It was a long road. She wasn't very responsive to us for a very long time - she didn't care when we left her in the church nursery, she didn't reach for us when we went to pick her up - she was in her own world. She has gradually come into our world, but it has been a long process. Sometime in the last year, she has started seeking out affection. We waited so long for it, her affection is the greatest treasure in the world. So last night, as I sat there with her, soaking it up, I reflected on how far we've come. She has made so many incredible strides, but it's not really her that I was thinking about - it's me. This little 5 year old princess has turned my view of life on it's head. Last night, doing something completely ordinary to the average person, I had a profound thought: I used to think that the way to impact the world around you is by DOING, but the reality is, it's about who you ARE.

Think on that for a minute.

You don't change the world by DOING, you change it by BEING.

Sure, we need to DO good, but the doing comes from who we ARE, not the other way around. We can free ourselves from the American way of constantly needing to GO and DO and DO SOME MORE if we can really grasp this thought. We can rest in the fact that we are enough - without the perfect house, car, manicure, career... we are still enough. We can just BE, and let the love flow out from there. Our DOING needs to be a reflection of our BEING. It really lifts a weight off my shoulders to know that it's okay that I'll never be able to do it all, and I can still impact the world around me. God has a plan for each of us. Sometimes it may not seem as big as you want it to be, but remember, it's not always about how much you DO. Sometimes it's about who you ARE in your every day life.

The value of a life isn't measured by IQ or ability. It isn't measured by achievements or worldly standards. God has a purpose for every life.

I am so thankful to have such a precious princess that radiates love and goodness, and is such an incredible teacher. She doesn't even need words.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Don't you have enough kids already?

Why Adoption? Why on earth are they adopting? Don’t they have enough kids? I’m sure these are the top questions on most people’s minds right now.  So I’m going to go ahead and put them out there and answer them. YES, we have enough kids!  We have 5 beautiful, vibrant, wonderful kids.  Two are mine from a previous marriage but 100% loved by my husband as his own.  One joined our family through a temporary guardianship and we later had the joy of adopting him.  Two are ours together.  The 7 of us are close.  As tight knit as any biological family, and I would venture to say more tight knit than many.  We are strong.  We've weathered challenges.  We've seen God’s glory.  We've cried, praised, worshiped, and conquered together.  We've learned that blood and genetics do not define family – love does.  YES, we have enough kids!  Our house is full, and our ban...

Grieving fearfully & wonderfully made.

The grief seems to hit out of nowhere. Most of the time it lays dormant, but some days it just takes my breath away. This is the grief of the special needs mom If you have known me very long, you know I am FIRMLY planted in the camp of thinking that my children with disabilities were perfectly made. I have quoted Psalm 139:14 a million times. I just don't believe God makes mistakes. And yes, it gets philosophically deeper and more complex than that, but at the end of the day, I hold fast that people with disabilities are not broken & God has a plan for them. But some days I grieve. Sometimes this plan is not easy for me to understand. Some days this particular picture of "fearfully and wonderfully made" Is. Not. What. I. Want. There are days I want off this path and on the path where my kids are all honor students. I don't want to spend the next 30 years changing diapers, but I might. I long to have conversations with my daughters. I don't want to navi...

Ways to support our adoption (LOTS of them are FREE)

Ways to support our adoption: FREE ways to help: Give us your stinky old shoes! - We are collecting shoes to be reused in developing nations through an entrepreneurship program. Our goal is 10,000 pairs, so it is a God-sized goal and we need your help! This program has BIG potential to pay it forward: our adoption grant receives 40 cents per pound for the shoes, an entrepreneur is set up to sell them and earn a living wage, and low cost shoes are available to people in need.  Even better: talk to your work or church and set up a box! If you'll watch it and let us know when it's full, we'll come collect them! We have a HUGE goal to meet, and we need your network too! Help us check the current drop offs and bring us shoes when they overflow. Since we do not live in town, this is an especially big help! Current drop offs are: Lumbermart and Stage in Guymon, the Methodist Student Center and Church of Christ Student Center in Goodwell, Mills in Hooker, and the Post Offi...